What Story is Your Biography Going to Tell?

Living Vicariously
Cyrus groaned as he marked his 8th grade students Social Studies test papers. He felt worn out and turned on the television. The suspense of American Idol thrilled him for a few exhilarating seconds before he gave into the nagging voice of duty. He got up to prepare for classes tomorrow and strangled his brief vicarious encounter with show business.

The Day of Judgement
That night Cyrus had the same dream that had visited him often over the past few years. In the dream he was about to take a test to get his Masters Degree in history. There was a large book with tiny print that he should have studied, but Cyrus had never opened it, and now his day of judgment had arrived. He woke up from the dream with his heart pounding and a gnawing feeling in the pit of his stomach - just as he had on previous occasions when this dream pierced his moment of awakening. He trudged through the day pushing the remnants of this raw sensation out of his mind.

Unfulfilled Hopes and Ambitions
Cyrus wanted to be an actor and dancer but never took classes or tried out at auditions. He choked off his fantasies with the safety of teaching and the respectable duties of parenthood. Any whiff of longing was smothered with blankets of defeatist comments choking off the air supply. Cyrus’s dream returned several times to remind him of his true yearnings. How would he feel when it came time to read his personal history? When his final exam rated him on whether he had honored his authentic self, what grade would he get? Cyrus’s persistent dream begged him to proof read the manuscript of his life to date before it went into print. Finding a way to be involved with the performing arts would be like editing the content of his biography. What a celebration awaits him as he is awarded his ‘degree’ - that of ‘mastering’ his journey through life without regrets.


Will Cyrus take notice of his powerful dream? What do you think?

Copyright, Jeanette Raymond, Ph.D.

Permission to be a little naughty

I Do What's Right! How Dare My Dream Make Me A Bad Person!





Clayton was angry that he repeatedly dreamt of being late for a train, bus, plane, meeting friends etc. In his waking life he was the exact opposite. He took pride in always being punctual, organized and reliable. He despised himself in his dream world. He was mystified as to why he was dreaming of himself doing things he wouldn't 'dream' of doing in his conscious life.

I Have To Be Perfect At All Costs
As a young teenager Clayton had been the victim of prejudice and racisim. He had witnessed cruelty towards members of his family and community. The slurs hurled at his family related to being unreliable, useless, unfit to hold jobs or live with folks of the dominant culture. The only way for him to survive was to be like the "other folk." He had to be better than good to prove that he was worthy of living among the majority.

In late adulthood Clayton's dreams about being late and unreliable - " being bad" haunted him. The dreams came to give him permission to be a little naughty! He had not had a chance to be a rebellious teenager or push against authority to find his own rhythm. The dreams kept nudging him to love all of himself and not just those 'perfect' bits that he had cultivated when he needed to survive as a teenager. What a great gift of freedom his dreams gave him. Do you think he will use it?

Copyright, Jeanette Raymond, Ph.D.

Dreams As Wake Up Calls

Tania Wants to get Accolades
Tania wanted a job where she could be recognized and lauded for her talents. She rejected taking jobs where she wouldn't be special and important. She preferred to suffer unemployment than take a job with anything less than immediate accolades. She envied those who had made a name for themselves and earned respect and financial rewards.

In her early forties she had a dream as follows:
"I was in a swimming contest and came first in the race. Everybody clapped and cheered and I felt happy and proud. I was picked for the Olympic swim team. I knew that my team were getting ready to take part in the relay race. I didn't how to get to the right place. I noticed the time on a big clock which meant that the race had begun. I heard the announcer on television comment on the race and I kept asking where the pool was. By the time I got there the race was over and I had not been part of the Olympic tournament."

Watch it! You May Miss The Boat
Tayna is getting a visual message that if she doesn't pay attention to the time, she will have missed the boat in her life. Waiting for the perfect job without tracking the way the world is moving means that she will be passed by and forsake the chance to make something of her life. The dream is encouraging her to get her head out of the clouds( the pride of the praise and cheers) and look at the clock of her life ticking away, to stay on the ground with her fellow humans ( the team) in order to have some achievement and meaning in life. If not, the dream shows her that she will be disappointed, left out, and forgotten.






Copyright, Jeanette Raymond, Ph.D.


Dreams are excellent wake up calls for us if we bother to pay attention to them and work on their meaning within a group, with a close friend or in therapy.

Can I Be The Perfect Mother Without Jealousy?

What If I Am Not The Perfect Mother!
Miriam has been longing for a child. She is pregnant and wants to be a perfect mother. Yet she is concerned that she will have to give all her attention to the baby after it is born, and not get any herself. She is worried that she won't be able to be unselfish and patient with her baby. She never had much of a childhood herself and feels a little jealous that her baby will get the chance of a real childhood that she herself never had.

Then she dreams that her baby is born as an adult and all black.

The Calming Gift Of The Balancing Dream
The dream comes to help her balance many contrary emotions. The baby is black, showing that Miriam has both black and white inside her - light and dark aspects of her personality, selfishness and selflessness.

The baby is born fully grown and an adult. The dream balances out her need to be a child and not have to take care of others, with the fact that she is an adult, but can still have childish wishes.

The dream acts as a balancer, giving her comfort that all parts of her are acceptable and normal, healthy and necessary for a full life - as in the creation of her baby. Miriam can be less scared of not being perfect and find ways in which she can be both adult and child as she learns to mother. For in being the adult she is a good responsible care taker. In being a child she identifies with her baby and can feel it's pain, hunger, distress, and need for intimacy.

Working on this dream with me allowed Miriam to enjoy motherhood and get in touch with her unfulfilled needs. She began finding ways in which she could ask for them to be met, and find acceptable ways to receive them. She took big strides in harmonizing her inner chaos - and became the better mother for it!






Copyright, Jeanette Raymond, Ph.D.

Dreams As Guardian Angels

Don't Do That! It's Dangerous!

A few weeks ago Jane was considering hiring someone to do an expensive job for her. It came on the heels of having spent a lot of money developing and completing a project. She had invested a lot of time and energy in the project, but needed someone with specialized skills to add some finishing touches. She met with the prospective contractor and the following day had this dream:
"It was dark and two women came into my place and stole flowerpots, laughing at me in the process. When I got out of bed I saw that the floor of the hallway had been taken up. I was expecting the mess since I was going to do some remodelling. Then I went into the kitchen. I was shocked and distressed to see the floor taken up there, everything pulled out and misplaced. There was no room for me, and everything was in disarray. The contractor had eaten part of a grapefruit and just left the rest. I was devastated with the state of my kitchen."

Powerful Visual Hint
Jane was given a very powerful visual hint that maybe the contractor she was considering hiring was going to leave things worse than they were before - half done, wasted money, and a messy outcome. She told me about the dream and as we worked on it together, she realised that she could protect her project and embellish it in ways that gave her more control.






Copyright, Jeanette Raymond, Ph.D.