Self-Confidence or Power Trip?
Lucas was clear about his criteria for success - managing everything by himself. Asking for help was a failure and a sign of weakness. He was determined never to let other people have power over him by needing their help or advice. That meant becoming a machine that could tackle anything without feelings getting in the way. He wanted to prove he wasn't scared of anything or anyone.
Revenge Gives Lucas a Sense of Power
He fantasized about sticking it to his old school mates who made fun of his efforts to shoot during their hunting trips. Lucas had been afraid of guns and didn't want to show that he didn't approve of killing animals for sport. Now he felt like he could "kill" anything! He woke up most mornings telling the world to "bring it on!"
The Dream Brings Lucas Back to Earth
A dream woke Lucas one morning that shattered his sense of confidence. He dreamed that he was out skeet shooting. There were lots of other people around watching. People from his past life, family, friends, and school mates. He shot at a can, the gun sprang back and hurt him in the face. It turned back and bit him!!
Bravado Backfires and Turns to Self-destruction
Lucas's dream was a wake up call that he had gone too far in his efforts to feel in control and powerful. Lucas wanted to show off in front of all the people in his life - all those who had mocked his fear of guns, who had ribbed him unmercifully. The dream showed Lucas that he had become just like them, interested in the kill to display his prowess. He was using his power to feel superior and denegrate others rather than to make his life meaningful and satisfying.
Sabotaging Power or Care Taking Power?
Lucas got a visceral punch when the gun spring backfired and hit him in the face - the one part of him that interacts with the world. He was given the message that his determination to go it alone, pretend he could manage without the normal give and take in relationships was not in his best interests. Lucas was in fact sabotaging himself. He was hurting himself by ignoring his need for compassion, collaboration, team work, love and understanding. His dream showed him just how destructive a path he had chosen. He was in grave danger of killing off all the good healthy parts of himself just to satisfy his ego.
Using The Dream Message Profitably
Lucas worked with me on this dream. We discovered that he didn't know the difference between power to hurt and power to stick up for yourself. He began to develop and appreciate the power of his personality, his compassion, his loyalty, his sense of right and wrong. Lucas didn't need to fight with other people to prove his manliness or to warn people not to mess with him. Lucas realized that not everyone in the world was out to screw him, and that he had ample capacity to protect himself using his sense of worth and the right to be treated respectfully.
Lucas was lucky to have the dream and work out what it meant in his work with me. Lucas is now able to consider his choice of action when he feels mocked or made fun of. He asks himself whether his response is an act of bravado likely to recoil back on himself, just like the spring of the gun in his dream, or whether it is an act of self-respect and growth.
Stay tuned for more about Lucas and his personal growth through his dreams
Copyright, Jeanette Raymond, Ph. D.
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